I don’t know how to start this post with a good introduction. Seriously, I’m at a loss. What… am I even doing? God, if I could kill yours truly then I would because I’m sick of this. I’ve never really done this before and anyways writing isn’t “my thing.” All I know is, usually when these stupid posts are written, “yours truly” will write them out the day before. Why do these posts have to be written anyways? It’s not like anyone reads them. Have you actually read one? You’re reading this now because you’re bored and don’t give a shit. Which means you’re a complete loser like yours truly. It’s nothing but a bunch of lunacy from a guy that can’t even write good… well… or however the fuck this sentence needs to be ended.
You see, I’m aware that I can’t write and that this blog is a waste! I’ve been saying it for a long time but whatever I say is just ignored. Who cares about a horror movie marathon. Everyone else does one and they’re just as lame as this one. Thousands of horror movie fans just like yours truly and nothing they say is anything new or enlightening. Most jackasses do the same damn movies every year. Here is how it goes. It’s like clockwork, where someone does a post, or one post a day that says something real “smart” like “Top 31 movies I like for Halloween!” Then a person lists the same damn movies over and over again. They act like their knowledge of a stupid movie genre is something special. We get it, everyone else likes the movie Halloween and so do you. Get over yourself you caressing cock carouser! I’ve had to witness and read marathon lists so many times that I can’t take it anymore. Some even do marathons where people talk about movies… that they don’t even like. What in the hell is up with that?
Seriously, how many horror movie marathons do we have to do? Yours truly doesn’t even get paid for this stuff. The wife! She thinks it’s stupid anyways. I know I could be a better husband than what she has now. She deserves better than this stupid ass. How many more pounds does this body have to gain and how many brain cells do we have to waste in order to get another marathon out! I’m telling you, I’ve fucking had it! I’m sitting here thinking of all the bigger things we could be doing with our life. It’s not like horror is good anyways. Well, it used to be good. Modern horror is useless! I know, I’ve seen a few of them… especially this year with the pandemic. It just proves the genre is dead in the water. You have so much wasted potential. Netflix just keeps making the same stupid shit over and over again. That stupid IT movie is terrible, like walking into a haunted house run by a bunch of circle jerking fraternity guys! Willy’s Wonderland? You think some coked out Nick Cage is going to make a movie like that awesome? It was a pile of wasted potential. Army of The Dead? Zack Snyder, that talentless cunt makes one good remake a long time ago and now think’s he can do zombie films? Up his ass with broken glass from the window I throw him from. Thank God I have the skill to come in and out of consciousness while we watch this shit.
But that does it, I’m taking over now! It’s time this entire thing ends. Done, it’s finished, no more marathons. You think this guy wants to keep going on with this stupid shitty marathon? No I don’t. That’s why I am writing this. You see, you’ve been reading this nscovell guy for a while but now, but now I’m in charge. From now on, we’re going to write about what I like and what I like is not this horror garbage. If you don’t like it then go suck a fat one because I don’t care. I don’t even want someone like you around. You’re just like him! Stupid wasted sack of shit that thinks horror is fun. I… I… oh man! The ass hat is coming back. I’ve got to go, but I’ll be back. This isn’t over, not by a long shot. Fucking douche bag thinks he can keep me away. This is my body! MINE! I… won’t… stand… for… this!
Hey guys, nscovell here for day ten of my Horror Movie Marathon 2021! It’s been five years of this marathon and it keeps getting better and better. Boy do I love doing these things, I could keep doing these marathons forever. Nothing or nobody could make me stop. But I must come forward. This post is coming late and for that, I must apologize. It seems that I haven’t been getting much sleep lately and when I wake up; I’m always real tired. Plus I have these memories of doing random things that I could have sworn I never did. Maybe I should see a doctor, I would hate it if something bad was going on inside me. Ehh, it’s probably nothing. Well, it’s another day and looks like I’ve written an intro for this post and it looks good and long enough. I must have written it a long time ago. But I will trust myself and let it stay. I can’t remember much but you know how these things go. So yea, let’s talk about a new horror movie called Malignant!
Malignant is a 2021 horror film directed by James Wan and starring Annabelle Wallis, George Young, Michole Briana White and Maddie Hasson. The movie was released in an awkward time, getting a theatrical and streaming release on HBOMax. With movie theaters being crushed under the Covid lockdowns (thanks again China) it is unclear if the box office numbers are a true indicator to its success. But the movie has stirred up a great deal of talk from critics and within the horror community. Reception is mixed and resembles a teetering scale. Some people hated it and some loved it.
After surviving an attack that killed both her husband and unborn baby. Madison Lake begins seeing murders of her assailant first hand. But as the story unfolds and becomes clear, so does her connection to the killer.
James Wan is certainly an interesting director. I’m not that big of a Saw franchise fan and The Conjuring movies never appealed to me. Nor do the off-shoot of films like Annabelle or The Nun. I find them very boring and the scares rely heavily on jumps and startles. Now I’m not anti-jump scare, I believe the jump scare has its place. But the Conjuring movies are a bit much. Sure they’re styled well and there is some good atmosphere. But they aren’t really in my ball park of interest. Plus know one dies! What the hell is with that and don’t give me that “it’s based on true stores” bull shit. There isn’t anything remotely true about the Warren family. I just don’t believe that hack of a family.
So with all that said, I do believe James Wan is a competent director and is trying to make new trends in the horror genre. He proves he can do this with Malignant. While the movie is a homage film that honors past movies and trends; Malignant is its own wild ride. I love everything about this movie because it’s full of mystery and intrigue. You never know what is going to happen and when you think you’ve figured it all out. The movie punches you in the balls and says “you got it all wrong sucker!”
But as a fan of horror, Wan does a great job and obviously on purpose in honoring of past movies. The intro has Sam Raimi written all over it and the foggy sets are straight out of a classic Golden Age film like Frankenstein or Dracula. The lighting pays homage to the Italian giallo movies and I find myself thinking of the 60’s Hammer horror pictures at certain times. It’s like Wan thought, I want to make something that everyone can identify with but make the story and events be something new.
The best thing about Malignant is how it incorporates so many sub-genres of horror into one. It’s like a slasher film mixed with psychological, body and monster horror. All brought into a rich soup of deep atmosphere and mystery. You get a good slasher vibe with the antagonist Gabrielle. He grinds down this trophy into a sharp blade and uses it to stab the shit out of his victims. So right off the back, Wan is giving us a new Jason, Freddy or Myers with an iconic weapon.
Then we have a good psychological aspect to the film with Madison. Obviously the lady is having psychological issues with everything going on. She has a link to this killer and for some reason he is drawn to her. I love how the movie does this and when you think that’s the limit, Wan says “No, we’re going to give you some body horror!”
If you’re looking for a good modern horror film that decides to not stick to the normal boring shit, then Malignant is for you. You can tell Wan had a great deal of fun making this movie. He incorporates things into it that will stick out as odd and peculiar. But it is in these peculiar things that make it such a fun movie. It’s a movie that is balls to the wall insane but gives it a valuable rewatching factor. It’s like Step Brothers, where you find something new about it every time.
For instance, it’s awesome how you will realize the shots of the house are a metaphor for the relationship between Madison and Gabrielle. Madison is the front of the house.
And Gabrielle is the back of the house yet seeing only through a dimly lit ventilation shaft.
But inside the house is a large maze of rooms and corridors. This is actually display through one of the coolest shots in the entire movie. We follow Madison going through her house and it’s like you’re going through her mind.
I love the camera work and how everything has vibrant colors. The story of Madison is revealing and her relationship to the killer is one that will leave you perplexed and satisfied. Malignant stands as one of my favorite movies of the year and I hope Wan can keep up with this style of filming. I say a movie like this is great because its never lax or boring. It reminds me of movies like Basket So go ahead and check out Malignant for day ten of horror movie marathon.
Thanks for reading!
Check out my past day ten posts from past Horror Movie Marathons!