IT: Chapter 2 – Say Cheese and Die

The It: Chapter Two trailer two dropped at the San Diego Comic-Con. Like everything coming out of Comic-Con, the hysterics are running rampant because the trailer shows even more terrifying clips and obvious moments of the movie that will make an impact on our senses… blah blah blah blah. Comic-Con just seems to be a terrible thing. I assume everyone that comes out of there feels like Disney just shoved a rod up their ass. I really hope this movie does more than just the typical jump scares. To be honest, the trailer doesn’t do anything for me.

Trailer Trash

I notice a certain trend going on with movies (especially pop horror films) and the first It film did this last year. You release a nice long clip to the masses, we got this from the first trailer. A kind of… hook line and sinker for the audience. A guarantee getting peoples asses into the seats. Last year they released a short clip of Georgie’s encounter with Pennywise before that stupid Annabelle movie. Why couldn’t they keep Pennywise a secret? It would have created more of a presence when actually seeing the film. Hollywood thinks revealing everything is the key to a good marketing ploy and I guess (for real stupid people) it works. Wasn’t there a time when the monster of a film was never made known? I remember 1979’s Alien trailer. They didn’t show shit for this trailer!

Showing too much ruins everything. We go into the movie knowing all the scary moments and this new trailer is a massive criminal in that regard. The first IT: Chapter 2 trailer had that scene with the old woman. But we all know how it will play out. It was my biggest problem with the first movie. IT will appear as a warped old lady. Which doesn’t make sense because why would Bev be afraid of an old lady? Nothing indicates she would have that fear. But you know IT will come after her and Beverly will just run away.

Bloody Hell

This new trailer is giving too much away. We see Pennywise and his long tongue… which is creepy. Then we see how it escalates when he has an even more eviler smile… which is terrifying. Actually, it looks like Pennywise is posing for a picture. We see the scene with Beverly drowning in blood and it gets massive publicity claiming it’s the most blood in any horror movie. The most blood! Really? That’s a pretty major title to boast. 2013’s Evil Dead blood rain scene was pretty insane. What about Evil Dead 2 where Ash literally gets that huge amount of blood spouted on him from the wall! Shit what about Army of Darkness where the guy gets pushed down the pit and a massive blood geyser erupts? Anyone that has seen Dead Alive knows the “bloodiest scene” title is a pretty big boss to dethrone.

I really hate this trailer trend. Whoever is behind the marketing behind most horror movie trailers is probably a genius and also the biggest douche. They know what the mass population of morons get all hard nips over. But should they? If you give people too much then the real thing is worn like Goodwill clothing. It’s kind of like being a kid and seeing a brutal horror movie. It scares the piss out of you, but the second time you watch it; it loses it’s edge because you know what you’re getting. Your brain knows whats coming so there’s no building up of juices or that twitch in your muscles that prepare for fight or flight.

The More You Know

You know why movies like The Void and Baskin are so awesome? It is because they’re underground films and most people that saw it for the first time did so by searching and not even seeing a trailer beforehand. I mean, they are better films than all pop-horror but I went into them not knowing a damn thing. So seeing a dudes eye being cut out in Baskin just made me quiver! That’s what trailers are ruining! They’re ruining the suspense and terror of the scene because we know whats coming. Sure I read IT so I have a good idea of everything that’s coming. But the visuals aren’t hard hitting. I’ve seen Pennywise smiling and ready to slaughter a kid. I see the balloon tricks taking place and it makes me depressed. I should just stop watching movie trailers in general. I know the marketing of trailers won’t change. There are too many dumb asses dictating the horror market.

How It Should Be Done

If I could make the trailer it would be something like this. No drone shots of the town of Derry. No clips of each persons face looking with a scared or bewildered expression. No shots of people running or going into a funhouse. Don’t even show the damn clown in pure form. Don’t show his lair as well. Just start with total darkness. Have the voice of It speak roughly as if he’s contemplating his own thoughts. You can take that line where Pennywise talks about waiting for twenty seven years and how he’s dreamed and missed the Losers club. But make this all in the dark. Maybe some particles or blood dripping. Maybe while this is going on, the camera is panning upwards, as if climbing out of the depths of some cave or tunnel. Slowly light is revealing the sewers or something. Have it end where It concludes his speech with appearing in that orange lightning bug light and saying “Hello” to that little girl. You can have this growing tension accompanied by some screeching strings that builds in this terrifying crescendo.

That’s it. Yea, I literally came up with that trailer idea in no time at all. Make it short and make it sweet. We don’t have to show random clips of the film. What we get is something that builds tension but doesn’t really get too scary. It just gives us something to hope for and be excited about because short clips placed one after another is dumb. It doesn’t mean anything to real fans. It just panders to those fan boy vlogs on youtube where they discuss every fucking scene one after another. As if every scene means something amazing! It drives me nuts. I don’t know, I just hate these trailers and wish the process could be re-made. Trailers should be made accompany a movie. Be the item that edifies the film and not giving it away.

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